Between making dinner every night, keeping the house clean, and constantly driving to activities, you deserve more than a pat on the back. Yet your kids never so much as utter a “thank you.” It can be frustrating to show your kids how much you love them on a daily basis only to be met with a sullen response. You’re an underappreciated parent.
Or maybe not…
Instead of getting angry with your kids, you might try re-evaluating the “Love Languages” used in your family. The 5 Love Languages as described by Dr. Gary Chapman, are the various ways in which people send and receive love. Whether it be words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, or physical touch; each member of your family has a preferred style of being loved.
So you can keep offering your kids acts of service till you’re blue in the face, but it won’t help if all they need is a hug, or a kind word, or a special treat, or a trip to the park. Learn your child’s Love Language and you can experience a deeper connection and perhaps feel more appreciated.
Although the idea of Love Languages was originally created to conceptualize romantic love, it makes sense to apply it to kids as well. Children and teens need to feel a sense of belonging at home in order to build security and a positive self concept. If we want our children to grow up to have healthy adult relationships, we must to nourish them with family love while they are young. You can start this process now by visiting Dr. Gary’s Chapman’s website
and discover the Love Languages of your family members so that you can be more effective at expressing love.