25 Jun Ask First
The responsibilities of parenting are endless. There is always one more thing on our to-do list. It seems for every one task we mark complete, three more crop up in its place. One of the best things we can do is ask for help. This can be difficult to do because it almost feels like we are letting ourselves and our kids down. Instead we should view it as a way to make us better, more sane parents in turn, making our children’s lives better, too.
For me, it is a simple as asking my husband for an extra hand. It is very hard for me to ask because I have all these expectations of my responsibilities. Being a mostly stay-at-home parent shouldn’t I have it all in order? Shouldn’t the house be organized, the laundry done and the dogs already walked? Possibly. But I have to make room for the fact that I’m human. That sometimes I don’t have the time, energy or motivation to get every single task done exactly when it should be.
Over the weekend, I looked around my sufficiently cluttered house, knew I had some writing to do and and had a minor meltdown. All because I had the courage to ask for help, my husband graciously stepped in, mobilized our boys and got the house straightened out. Wouldn’t it have been so much easier if I simply would have dropped my guilt and asked for his help directly? I’m guessing he would have appreciated me asking in a calm way as opposed to my overly emotional reaction to all that needed to get done.
If we learn to ask for help in a proactive way, maybe we could start to look at this as a strength. Maybe reaching out before we get completely overwhelmed by life will be a skill we can all build on. Riverview Counseling Services is a great resource to give you support when it comes to parenting challenges. I encourage you to reach out to Riverview and get the help that you need now. For a free phone consultation, contact Cheryl Denz, MA, LCPC by calling 630-587-3777 x103 or by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org and Cheryl will schedule your consult within two business days.
Written by Diana DeVaul, MSW and Parent